truth.social

The not-permanently-enough former president Trump as he’s explaining thousands of top secret documents found among his things…

“There were personal things in there – items, golf shirts, shoes, clothing, you know, and – well I haven’t had time, I’m sure you can imagine, to go through all that, get my stuff out.”

This part gets laughed off, but his golf shirts being in the boxes adds another (sorry…) wrinkle. It suggests highly-classified materials were being stored (more commonly called ‘hidden’) at the residence, which is a problem. John Kelly and several staffers said that Trump would create chaos by squirreling away important documents, but the staff was usually able to sneak them back out when he wasn’t looking.

If you accept any part of this narrative as truthful, it begs the question: Were his personal things in the boxes to make it easier to get them out of the building?

Security: ‘Routine box check, sir. Can I see what’s inside?’

Trump: ‘Oh, sure! Just some old shirts and stuff, SEE? [quickly opens/closes box.]

Security: ‘In a box marked Classified/Top Secret?’

Trump: [laughs] Oh, that crazy Don Jr, always trying to be like that show ‘The A Team.’ Greatest show of all time. Great ratings! Gotta love that Mr. T guy! Anywho, Don Jr. – his favorite was that Mr. Face character – LOVED him, had posters all over his room as a kid, it was kinda freaky, really, but he took all of our regular boxes from Housekeeping and disguised them like this to be funny! So creative. Impressive, isn’t it? Yeah, his teachers all said he was the most creative kid they’d ever seen in the history of the world! Maybe the universe. Very big, the universe. Most people don’t know that, but I do. It’s big, the biggest universe anyone has ever seen. I ran the Miss Universe Pageant, ya know. I guess that means I technically ran the universe, which is why I know so much about it.’

Security: Ok, thank you Mr. President. The Bidens are arriving at 1:00, so we should keep things moving

Amusing as it may be, there are only 3 reasons why his shit could get mixed up with confidential shit, and – spoiler alert – they can all end in an orange jumpsuit.

1. He’s careless about protocols for handing state secrets;
2. He knows about the rules, but they simply don’t apply to him, or
3. He’s too stupid to realize that intentionally mixing his shit in with confidential materials shows Intent to Defraud.

Unfortunately, his brain is a bag of snakes; no one could show his intent on anything more complex than placing his McDonald’s lunch order.

Also, if the real reason was the accidental commingling of personal items (which we all accept as baloney of the first order), he had over a year of back-n-forth with the FBI, first pretending to give back then denying there was anything more. The idea that he couldn’t assign one of his army of lick-spittles to take his personal items out of the boxes begs credulity. But if more time was needed, he or his counsel could’ve simply said, ‘we need more time.’ He would’ve been given a certain amount of latitude because he was being compliant and appeared to be acting in good faith (just like Pence, Biden, and any other former executive who’d forgotten he’d brought work home).

But even his diehard fans know he didn’t want to appear compliant. Being compliant is weak. Instead, he opted for his favorite power move: he lied, delayed, and distracted. He tried to use the same ham-handed mob boss double talk on the DOJ that he used on us when we wanted his tax returns. And denying Russian interference in the election. Oh, and the ‘Perfect Calls,’ and so much winning at levels no one has ever seen before. He lied because he believed he was entitled to every one of those documents and deeply resented being told what to do. He lied because he can, and we’re stupid losers to think he gives two hasty f*cks about us or breaking the law. In fact —if Steve Bannon has taught him well— we should be thanking him. If breaking the law is this easy, he’s doing us a favor by pointing out all the weaknesses.

Did he have some diabolical plan for becoming Emperor Palpatine? No. The only thing he wants is to be important. He’ll show them off to people for that quick look of shock and awe, doesn’t matter who it is. He would inevitably flex in the wrong direction. He’d trot those docs out to someone who knows their value, and I’d be here in my hijab writing this with a spork on my week’s ration of toilet paper.

So, plan? No. They were just possible leverage that a shady-ass wannabe tycoon might find useful. They were a means of self-soothing his issues with object permanence (if I can’t see it, it doesn’t exist), and ‘this one goes to eleven’ narcissism with the addiction to being special. Having those files proves that he was a big deal once. Having to give them all back would make him look weak. It would knock his carat weight from 24 down to plain old 14 ct electroplate, and he resented the hell out of it.

That’s it. Nothing very complicated.